How Can That Be Codependent?
It could be. But read on. It doesn’t have to be.
There is a pattern in relationships that looks (or sounds) like this:
“He/She is my better half!”
“I can’t live without him/her.”
“He/She completes me.”
We sing about it!
We declare it to our friends!
We think saying this is a compliment!
It’s a way of saying how important the other person is to you. Many see it as another way of saying, I Love You.
But, what if it’s actually a sign of codependency?
How can that be? It just means I love this person so much! Or perhaps that’s not the message.
This way of thinking might mean you believe that you are unable (or afraid) to be complete all by yourself!
Ouch! That doesn’t seem right! I want to be whole, but I’m just not sure what that is.
Let’s look at what it means to be complete and whole within ourselves.
Wholeness means that the dualities of self within us begin to work together. Each represents part of us. These parts combine and balance:
- Your conscious human self and your superconscious spiritual self
- Your active masculine side and your receptive feminine side
This is the recipe for healthy relationships!
You no longer get stuck in the daily drama because now you can step back and observe life through a more expanded lens. Therefore, you see how you are acting and responding and you see how the other person in the relationship acts and responds.
You have more compassion for yourself and others because you are not blaming yourself or others. You recognize that being human means you trip up sometimes, even when you have good intentions.
As you heal and embrace your active masculine and receptive feminine energies, you are no longer looking to another person to complete you. Expecting them to complete you means you are giving away your sense of self. And if they don’t complete you in the way you expect, you are disappointed and angry. “I thought he/she loves me and that should mean that he/she knows what I need.”
If you embrace your inner masculine and feminine, they can help each other work through the tough times with compassion and understanding. You can be there as a steady safe place while each one heals and reaches toward oneness instead of working from the duality of separated parts of the self. Then, in a relationship, you become a safe, steady place where your friend or partner can come into their wholeness.
Codependency won’t live there anymore!
And best of all, together you can have lots of fun! You don’t have to “walk on eggshells,” afraid that you might say or do the “wrong thing.” Your child nature is free to be exuberant and joyful, perhaps for the first time.
There is a Transformational Tools Course for that!
Empower & Embrace Your Active Masculine
and Receptive Feminine Energies
This 6-week course will take you step by step through the process of accessing, acknowledging, and bringing this duality into oneness, no matter your gender or how you show up in your life.
You will not be the same when you finish the course. A new program will be in place that will impact your relationship to yourself and to others. You may notice a deeper connection with those you love and a greater sense of personal empowerment. It feels good to be you in a clear, powerful, and healthy way.
Are you ready to balance and become your most empowered self? I will be your instructor and look forward to working with each of you during your journey.
There has never been a more important time for this course. If we want to bring in a time of peace and oneness, what you learn here is foundational! This is a time to heal in order to bring in long-lasting peace on Earth!