Queen of Chaos
Let me start by saying that this is less a blog entry and more a drive-thru commentary. Would you like fries with that?
This week has been a blur studded with bits of “now what?” and accented, luckily, with “did that fix it?” For years, literally years, I’ve wished for one thing – the time to catch up. I know, I know, be careful what you wish for. Being put in traction would be one way to get a lot of time on my hands, and I’m not interested.
Walking down the hall yesterday with a new colleague, we were discussing the sensation of life’s details being out of control. I said, “Evidently I’m just supposed to live on the edge of being prepared and secure that everything is all set. From now on, I am embracing the fact that I am The Queen of Chaos. I’m just going to own it.”
I walked to my classroom wondering where that gem came from. That wasn’t me. It wasn’t my brain that made that sentence and fired that synapse and threw those words across my tongue. Nope. But they came out of my mouth and felt important, true even, and sort of comforting.
Well, I would be an awesome queen. If chaos is my kingdom, so be it.
I know I’m supposed to be commenting on color, and believe me, Color and Arlene’s words of wisdom have really bolstered my ability to thrive the last few weeks. I’ve been teaching my TAs to face their new challenges by first having a good laugh about the situation. I think they thought I was crazy initially, but I’ve noticed several of them giggling. Laughter helps.
As for color, I have a new aversion to wearing the color black. This is not like me. Black is my go to color. I looked it up in the Color Cards manual…duality, all the possibilities, facing the shadow side. I’ll have to ponder this, and your helpful thoughts are welcome so if you have some please share.
On that note, fare well this week. I have to vacuum my kingdom now. Chaos is one thing, but the top layer of dog fur has to go.